Hey hey hey guys! Remember me? Janel? I used to write semi-funny material for this blog? Well I’m back, and I’m going back to my librarian roots and starting a new bi-weekly series called #BuyThisBook. It should be inadvertently hilarious for all the wrong reasons, because even though I make my livelihood through books, I am quite terrible at writing book reviews. So buckle up and get ready to read the post that took me two weeks, a case of Pepsi, four bags of Doritos and six tubs of salsa to finish.
During the last few months of non-writing, I’ve been lounging around my house eating Oreos and bathing infrequently; meanwhile, my friends were writing actual books. They’re showoffs, and because of that, I’m going to punish them by publicly shaming them, i.e. highlighting a new fun book for you guys to read every other week this summer.
First up is a new entry in my favorite anthology series from Jen Mann! The newest one in the I Just Want to Pee Alone series is called I Just Want to Be Perfect, and it’s obviously great. It’s so good that I managed to rise from the cookie crumb ashes of my writing coma to write about being a 35 year old, first-time bridesmaid for Melissa Grunow, who — SPOILER ALERT! — is the author of the next #BuyThisBook entry.
This anthology centers on stories of women attempting to be perfect and failing spectacularly. Personally, I am really nosy and petty and I looooooooooooooove stories of people screwing things up. You could argue it’s because I screw things up quite frequently, but if you did I would probably just turn it around on you and point out a bunch of things you did wrong (including telling me those things, obviously that was a mistake).
Like I said, I’m a contributor to this fine collection, and my story, Here Comes the Bride(smaid) is about how I cannot handle certain uber-feminine rituals, like getting a pedicure. But don’t just read this anthology because you want to know how someone could possibly fuck up something as simple as paying someone to paint their toenails. There’s also Kim Forde’s essay about the terror at 40,000 feet that is pumping in an airplane bathroom in her essay The Breast Pump Corporate Travel Log. You can also read about Nicole Leigh Shaw’s kids who enjoy trolling her on a daily basis in her essay A Pantry is Just a Closet with Food In It. Also, side note: even if you hate every single one of the essays in this book, you can’t deny that these women can come up with a bomb-ass title.
I could go on and on, but instead, let me give you a bullet-point list of the main ideas I would like you to take away from this rambling review:
- Book reviews are hard.
- Anthologies let you skip around and find your favorites.
- In this case, your favorites are bloggers, so you have instant access to even MORE great writing that you know you’ll like!
- This is also a drawback because so many of the essays are great that after you finish the book, you’ll fall into a giant timesuck of online reading.
- You can win a free copy below
Wait WHUUUUUUUUUT? True story — I loved this book so much that I’m giving away a copy! Enter below and if you win, I’ll send you a copy to read for yourself. I loved it that much that I figured out how to run a giveaway on my very own blog. I know — baby’s all grown up.
Enter away, everyone! But don’t worry — if you’re not the contest type, or if you can’t wait an entire week to discover your new favorite blogger/writer, you can always order your own copy on Amazon. I mean, $6 on Kindle? Dude. Get on that.
Follow me on Facebook and Twitter so you never miss a post. Better yet, pop your email address in the box at the top of the page and subscribe! Also, you can also read my essays in I Just Want to Be Alone and You Have Lipstick on Your Teeth.
***BTDubs, I’m also an Amazon.com Associate, which means every six months I get a check for like $1.50 when people click on the links above and order anything at all. Just so you know how much of a baller I am.***